Money thoughts π¦π΅
My grandpa has this idea that from everything he does, he gotta make money out of it, and always looks for ways and calculates approximately how much he would get from doing x thing. He has had small businesses his whole life, and now that hes older, he sells plants he germinates at the flea market once a week.
I, on the other hand, am unable to sell. I've sold stuff before, like when I was moving out of the US, I sold everything, but most things at a loss, since I was getting out of there quick. I've also independently tutored University students in math/physics/engineering courses for 10+ years interminently. However I felt a little odd when expecting payment from a student I connected with. This person is cool, but our relationship is bounded by this service I'm getting money in return.
I have a Passion Flower plant thats been producing a lot of fruit by its own, and its a lot more than I can consume. But what I think while gathering them is 'i'll give this to my friends, my girlfriend and I eat the rest' and then I remembered my grandpa. He would be saying that, with this production, I should plant more and sell the fruits, and I would make a lot of money out of it. But I'd rather give it for free to random people, than start to sell it.
To me, selling stuff, specially plants/food, creates a barrier between me and the buyer. its like 'Hey I would love to give you this, but only if you give me money (money money moneyπ¦) in return, otherwise I will not'.
Whe you give someone something (even voluntary work at a farm for example) sometimes people give you something in return, even if its food, a fruit, or some company. Sometimes they give you nothing. But to me, the fact that I didn't put a barrier between us is far more valuable. Makes me happy to give stuff to people, than to be making money. Money will never be enough.
Now that I'm and engineer, working for a company is different, I came here to do my job and get paid. Still, if I connect with a coworker, I'll give them fruits and plants for free :)